You, me and droplets of joy.......

You, me and droplets of joy.......

My crazy, madly in love yet wasted heart always looks for a reason to remember you. Every now and then anything or everything happening around me makes me remember you. I believe you will at least agree with me if not feel exactly the way I feel about it. Our memories are like countless pearls spread across my life. They mostly touch me, even when I am not thinking about you. Sometimes they smile at me, hold my hand and take me away in some other world in a fraction of seconds. I fly with those tiny moments of joy every now and then. Your presence is ubiquitous in my life.

These pearls come and pump life into me. Today was one such day.

I was at this birthday party. It was a party of all sorts possessing all the important ingredients of a birthday party. As the occasion necessitates a birthday cake was brought to the center stage. And then the DJ played a background score homogeneous to the occasion and the cake.

“Wishing happy birthday to you, May all your dreams come true”

Oh my god! The song left me awestruck. I was blossoming with the exuberance of a new order. I was experiencing a new found zeal in me, around me everywhere. Such is the power of memories. They always posses enough power to hijack you, to take you on a flight to the terrain unknown. These tiny moments of joy, pearls again took me away from my own self. I found myself in the car with you. The car parked on the road side at a place ordinary for the world but special for both of us. With no fun-fair or any special lights focusing on the subjects. No human chaos around those small yet long lasting moments of celebration. Just a small cake, enough for both of us to eat and a candle well lit to decorate the occasion. The center stage was my hand holding the cake. There were no balloons to burst, there was only laughter. It didn't last the usual for such an occasion; it was just about for more than few minutes. But yes, the song was still the same.

I still can’t forget your facial expressions the moment when I played the number. I could only recall now is loads of excitement, joy and happiness on your face. Your reaction was overwhelming to the core. Those little eyes were wide open with the surprise, were happy deep down and as always were speaking more than any other language I know of.

Such was/is the undercurrent of subtlety and simplicity in our celebrations, in our existence and in our being.

Your facial expressions were one of the best birthday return gift I have ever got in my life.

True is the saying, that memories outlive its principle and its beholder too. Sweet memories always bring a smile and cheer us when we are flying low. The most amazing thing about them is that they look for you to make you feel happy. They will pick you up in the moments of sadness and refresh you.  Amidst everything they give you a reason to be happy and smile out of nowhere.

They also inspire you to create even more such simple moments of joy… my tiny pearls.

Take a plunge, dive into the simplicity and create subtle moments of joy so that years later you can relive them and simply smile at life.      

©KayJay

Naked Soul: A perspective

Naked Soul: A perspective

It’s a beautiful thing to have someone around you, someone who is there for you. In nutshell, someone loves you and forever. It gives us a strange feeling of victory, assurance and security against the fear unknowns. It also gives us an opportunity to not only dream but to live through those dreams as well. Sounds like a fairytale but all we want is to be naked in front of that someone.  For our comfort or may be a comfortable lie, we often tag it as ‘Naked Soul’. The very same person makes us gullible and vulnerable too.

But then do we want to appear ‘naked’ in order to see the other person ‘naked’ as well? Is it a perfect barter we are trying to create?

Does it happen like that?

‘Nakedness’ as they say is an outcome of trust and faith. Trust and faith, with time even these virtues have lost their meaning in our being still they remain inseparable and integral part of all our emotional endeavors.  I wonder sometimes what follows what. Does love creates trust and faith or it’s vice versa.  To be on one side, I chose to opine that trust and faith create love.  The same virtues propel us to be naked as well.  Hence, being naked is no short than being in love. Rather they have an equal standing.  Trust and faith allows us to see through the obvious. An ‘obvious’ which is not so visibly obvious. And nakedness epitomizes the whole phenomenon of trust and faith.

Being part of the herd, or in denial, or out of respect or may be out of fear or being ‘ignorant’ we consider our respected self to be completely naked  in front of God. Of all the probable reasons listed above I feel ‘fear’ remains the most prominent one. The genesis lies in our beleaguered soul dealing with invincible and supreme figure like God.  Though I have doubts on tagging it as an outcome of love. 

As our past or our past lives go, being in love we always want and collect proofs of its existence. We prefer and want a more figurative love. We want a hand to hold upon, we want to hear melodies of love all time and we want to express our love by trying to be sharing more collectibles and creating memorabilia. Though all of it started with ‘Soul’ rather ‘Naked Soul’ but we often become busy with our new found love continuously pampering our sensory organs or get busy in our maladies evolving around it.  

Soul; aka the ‘Naked Soul’. Isn’t soul naked since its origin? And will always be naked. Soul is bereft of any biases, malice, cunningness, ugliness or beauty of life.  Yet it has been placed in the core, central to every bit of movement we make in our respective life.

The embodiment of our soul is what constitutes our physical being. Sometimes the covers are fancy and sometimes they are what they are. But then there is soul; leading from the front, enlightening our being. It also creates the charisma of self awakening. Soul by any means is the supreme sensory object we have been blessed with.  Or let me put it this way. The supreme has been there always, each time there is a civilization which comes up and goes into ruins after a while.

In a more individualistic sense, through our outer sensory organs we make serious attempts to be naked all the time. No, I do not mean that all of us are promiscuous but yes as somebody anonymous said ‘You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince.’  All this while, our objective remains to be naked in terms of our soul. We yearn for being naked to the core. But then we do get affected by popular under currents prevailing in the immediate environment; an undercurrent of expectations.

Expectations: Another irony of our life; of our being. To what I believe, Soul does not have expectations.  It simply wants to be naked, to be just the self. Our physical being, the outer shell impregnates our expectations. All in the name of soul, the irony continues the whole life. All we want is some beauty to relish in front of our eyes, some melodies to cherish for our ears and an attractive body to make love with. Incomplete expectations keep infuriating us, making us angry at times, jealous and what not all in the name of Soul. It is strange that non stakeholders such as outer sensory organs get to decide on what our soul wants. How shallow of us to keep ‘servicing’ our physical being with a defined shelf life to attain something which is immortal. Love is immortal as they say and so is soul.  Is soul a prisoner of our physical being? Of course, not. But then why do we allow at times or rather mostly the mortals to reign in the immortals constituents of our being.  

So what does our soul wants or needs?

Soul needs stairs to graduate to the next level.  Soul needs mirror to see her. Soul needs light to shoo away the darkness. Soul needs rains to wash away the baggage of sins. Soul needs another soul without any expectations, prejudices, biases and discrimination.

Soul celebrates its being by being enlightened and awakened. It dances around being naked.

Your soul is that same sunlight or rain making me naked.

I am a naked soul in front of your soul.

©Kay Jay  

     

     

Silences of a Soul.....

Silences of a Soul…..

In utter silence of my soul,

You were still humming inside me,

Everything else was immobile,

Only I could hear the roar,

The voices of just and fair were screaming out loud,

And then enters the virtue of deserve under a shroud,

I lost you again; I lost you to the world,

Perhaps you never mine,

Perhaps it was just a dream,

I held these silences in my lap,

Deep in my slumber you still appeared in my dream,

Yet again I set my foot on the journey of life,

And, I met you there again, my life…

©Kj

You & Me....

You & Me

I need to grow as I need to let it go, 
My 'teenage' dreams and its beauty serene, 
My 'clandestine' feelings and its cluttered stream, 
A thought to grow old with you and to share our destinies, 
To let the world know my undying love for you, 
To be there with you always in those undesired uncertainties,
It is difficult to forget those drives and walks, 
Our million arguments and those inconclusive talks, 
Those moments of understanding and those special gestures by you, 
I wander like a puzzled soul these days and without any cue, 
Come back for good, come back for me, 
After all, it has always been about you and me......


©Kj

O' My Love........

O' My Love.............

Few thoughts to decipher, few words to say,

I wonder where my life is, and where is my way,

Love is a luxury perhaps I can’t afford,

I know the destination but I don’t know the road,

My heart beats for you; I just hope you can hear me,

I am tired of being alone now, please be there with me,

You are the sun of my life; my dreams are the rays,

You make me feel happy, and with whom my fear allays,

I trust you more than me now; you are my little prince,

Come and hold me now, I don’t want to wince,

I wish you were here right now with me and that’s what I always pray,

I will be waiting for you always, never leave me ever in disarray………..

Kj

Life is a Challenge!!!!!!!

Life is a Challenge!!!!!!! 

 

I was born with a jigsaw puzzle in my lap,

A puzzle which never got solved rather it increased the gap,

The gap of understanding and execution,

The gap of permissible and violation,

Life continued to confuse me of its existence,

I think it was a challenge to test my persistence,

Things looked sometimes beyond control,

Yet there was a hope that my thoughts and action will play a bigger role,

Today I am standing at a place where I feel lonely,

Coz I have nobody to share my plights and to give me a feeling of security,

At times I am fragile and weak,

Yet there is a ray of hope down the street,

That ray is the only positive source around,

Keeping me alive and I am still fighting on the ground,

I hope someday I will emerge victorious,

No matter how tough the life will be, I WILL EMERGE VICTORIOUS!

Kj

My Last Dream.........

My Last Dream.......

It was a meeting of all sorts. They were meeting after a long gap and so were there emotions for each other. Both stared at each other for long, as if the world outside them has come to stand still and is witnessing this divine meet. The twinkling eyes and a generous smile was more than anything else one could have wish for and even these gestures were unanimous. The rekindled hopes again started breathing and their undying love for each other was taking it to the next level. Their reverberating hearts were adding rhythm to the otherwise serene and peaceful conversation. Each word from either side was letting the heart play a new beat. Gradually even their hearts started beating in tandem with each other, and together they were humming a sound. A sound of love, filled with emotions of passion and intensity to make an impact as if they are beating for the one last time. 

Both of them had put their sensory organs at rest, for they wanted their souls to talk free of any biases and prejudices their holders might possess. In just few minutes of meeting the spell bound souls were in a different world. A world so full of them, full of love they had for each other. The whole aura was beaming with their emotions for each other and amidst this soul to soul talk, their unrequited love was most happy. As the desire and need for pure love of both the souls were met in this divine meet.

They came closer and started looking more intensely at each other. Those pensive looks were making a killing inside. Nobody was uttering a single word, but in that deep silence every part of their body was talking. Their conversation even touched upon the facets which never came out so far in their association or to the world at large in general. Both of them felt lighter after sharing what they always wanted to but could not do it so far. Today even those gaps were met, even those long distances were covered and even those bridges were made which were never expected to come up so easily. That was the most glaring example of how powerful love is and how it can lead lovers to a beautiful place called heaven.

It was an experience of lifetime for both of them, as if they 'd just shrug off a huge backlog which was carried by them for ages. Today somebody with an insight of pious love took it off in few seconds only.  Both of them renewed each others licenses for happiness. Both of them were feeling the bliss of this conversation and were passionately contributing to it. None of them could not control the rumblings of their unrequited love and at first their lips met and they started exploring each other more adventurously. Both of them felt a Midas Touch as if both the souls reincarnated only for this divine meet. Both of them felt they have just lived a lifetime in those few moments of closeness rather oneness.

He played the song "As love is my witness" from Westlife:-

Once in a lifetime, you look in someone's eyes,
And it feels like the world stops turning at once, 
Well thats what it feels like for me, 
I knew right away this day would be standing together, 
Believing together is there in our reach, 
As love is my witness I swear......

I 'll be with you till the end, 
Nothing can tear this love apart, 
I'll put my hand upon my heart, 
This is the promise I make to you, 
Whatever comes we 'll see it through
Nothing can break it as the feeling is so strong, 
As love is my witness I swear................................

The music paced the passage of time a bit faster and both of them were dancing by now ,celebrating their oneness and their love. Since that was the only thing they could have offered to each other and they did it by offering Pure love.

The physical distances between them were no more, their love destroyed it with a bang and they started coming even closer still dancing but a bit slowly now. And eventually both of them were lying naked with each other, that was the last mile to be covered in this journey of pure passion. Though they were still exploring each other but there was a strong undercurrent flowing also. Both of them strongly felt complete deep inside. Yet there was a strong desire to be loved and make love and yes they made love forgetting the world outside, denying presence to any other entity between themselves.

Both of them made passionate love to each other that night and felt the celebration of life in those moments of joy,eternal bliss and most importantly about the feeling of oneness.  
Both of them were lying down next to each other in each others arms, tightly holding on to the moment which they never wanted to pass. They cried and were still crying holding onto each other and somebody tweaked the light switch in the room. He was not there and he was nowhere to be found. My eyes were still wet with tears as perhaps I was happy to have everything finally. Yeah the dream got over and my lifeless body was still lying there on the bed....

Kj